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May 15, 2017

How do you know if you’re connecting?

How do you know if you’re connecting?

You know when you don’t have a good connection on the phone, but how about when you’re communicating with people in person? Do you know when the connection has been made? Can you tell when the connection is starting to go bad? Can you identify when the “call” has been dropped?

Most people have an easy time knowing when the connection is good on the phone. But have no idea, if they’re connecting with others, in every day situations.

How do I tell?  How do I know that I’ve connected with others?

I look for the signs. When I interact with people, whether one-on-one, in a group, or with an audience, I know I’ve connected when I sense:

  • Extra Effort — people go the extra mile
  • Unsolicited Appreciation — they say positive things
  • Unguarded Openness — they demonstrate trust
  • Increased Communication — they express themselves more readily
  • Enjoyable Experiences — they feel good about what they’re doing
  • Emotional Bondedness — they display a connection on an emotional level
  • Positive Energy — their emotional batteries are charged by being together
  • Growing Synergy — their effectiveness is greater than the sum of the contributions
  • Unconditional Love — they’re accepting without reservation

Anytime I interact with people and I see evidence of these signals, I know I’m connecting. I’ve learned what it takes to connect with others, and I’ve learned to gauge when I’m succeeding.

How are you doing when it comes to connecting?

When you interact one-on-one with someone important in your life, do you receive these signals? When you lead a meeting or attend a group function, are these connecting characteristics evident?

When you speak to an audience, do you connect with them in such a way that you’re not only effective at communicating, but it’s also a highly enjoyable experience for you and them? If you can’t answer these questions with a resounding yes, then you need to improve your ability to connect with people.

Everyone talks. Everyone communicates. But a few connect. Those who do connect, take their relationships, their work, and their lives to another level.

If you want to learn how to connect and thereby become more effective in everything you do, there is good news. Even if connecting with others isn’t something you’re good at today, you can learn how to do it and become better tomorrow.

Learning to connect with people can change your life.

Being disconnected wastes your time. It interrupts the flow of what you’re trying to accomplish, and it undermines your productivity. The bottom line is that connecting is everything when it comes to communicating.

“Connecting is the ability to identify with people and relate to them in a way that increases your influence with them.” — John Maxwell

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